A few years ago, I filled out a questionnaire for a popular on-line dating service. After answering what felt like a million personal questions, it came back that I was “UNMATCHABLE”. Seriously. This coupled with the fact that a friend once suggested to me that I could benefit from lessons in how to have a conversation, and my recent realization that I am one of those people who others, often repeatedly, forget they have met, has led me to consider the possibility that I am not as interesting as I could be. And so, I have decided to embark on an active campaign of re-education.
To get the ball rolling, I asked the readers of my previous blog: www.stookiehavers.wordpress.com, to send me their ideas and suggestions for how I, Stookie, could become a better, more interesting woman and human being. Initially, no one responded. After a pleading post, that verged on begging, my readers came through for me. Only one suggestion was deemed unacceptable. You can find their suggestions under the Page entitled “Readers’ Suggestions” at the top of this page.
Already some interesting conversations about what makes a person better or more interesting have emerged. For example, one friend pointed out that learning to make beer won’t make me a better person. No, that’s true. But will it make me more interesting? Yes, she thought it would. Equally, sharing at a party about my newly acquired CPR skills probably won’t win me any new friends, but if some day I save a life with those same skills, well let’s just say, I don’t think I’ll be coming back in my next life as a worm!
Another friend said, “Okay, I will make a suggestion, but you won’t like it. There isn’t anything you can do to be more interesting. It isn’t about the things you do, being interesting comes from the inside.” She suggested that trying to be interesting was in itself uninteresting. Certainly not the boost I was looking for, for sure, but still it’s useful input. I wonder if this is true? Does being interesting have nothing to do with effort? Is it really that interesting people don’t even try to be interesting? It could be. I kinda doubt it. Certainly I agree that most interesting people are driven by an internal passion for something and that this is most likely what draws us to them. But you know that expression, “those who can’t do, teach”, well, maybe, “those that can’t be, do.”
Based on the suggestions thus far, and with the goal of becoming both a better AND more interesting woman and human being, I have decided to start with the following suggestions:
(1) LEARN TO MAKE FIRE WITHOUT MATCHES – It’s just seems like the most natural place to start, given how important fire has been to the evolution of humans. Also, it was the first suggestion I received.
(2) 30 DAYS of YOGA – This just seems like a ridiculously challenging suggestion and frankly, anyone who knows me will tell you, it is unlikely that I will achieve it. But, it could make me a better person, so I will try it anyway. The start date will be announced soon, but will be after I have learned to make fire.
As I progress through this active campaign of re-education, I will blog about my experiences and insights along the way. In order to keep things orderly and neat, suggestions have been categorized, and posts will appear under these same categories.
An interactive blog is the goal here, so please keep those suggestions and any comments or insights you have about becoming a better, more interesting woman and human being, coming. There is page at the top titled Guidelines for Making Suggestions. Please read it before making a suggestion. Milestone dates will be listed in the side panel. For example, I am giving myself two weeks to learn how to make fire without matches. I will also periodically post a page about Other Interesting People (thereby tackling another reader’s suggestion). Suggestions for this section are also very welcome.
In the future, look also for on-going posts that will combine several readers’ suggestions into one: to reasearch a topic of interest, and to write stories about it. I will be researching and writing about the history of personal ads. Partly, because of my own on-again, off-again relationship with personals (see above!), and partly because of this little Edinburgh newspaper clip which I have been carrying around with me for months now. It indicates that personal ads actually date back to the earliest newspapers of the 17th century and that the first matrimonial agencies began cropping up in the 1700s. This intrigues me. Centuries of lonely hearts: What’s changed? What’s still the same? What were people looking for back in the 16oo’s and was it so different from what people are looking for now? What’s their stories?
I will also post links to sites, articles, and any inspirations I find along the way, on the side panel under Stookie’s Learning Resources, like this YouTube video of a song by Eytan and The Embassy, that I really like: